Home sick
What This Painting Means to Me
This painting is my way of reflecting on what “home” has meant to me over the years.
The blue-green tones and muted colors speak to a past filled with tension and change. My childhood wasn’t always peaceful—there were moments of conflict, confusion, and growing up too fast.
But that was then.
Now, 20 years later, this work represents more than memory—it’s a quiet release. It marks a turning point: stepping away from old responsibilities and beginning to care for myself. Returning to the capital, to who I truly am, with all the colors I’ve earned. Out of all my works, this one holds my heart.
It’s not just paint—it’s proof that healing is real, even if it takes two decades and a few nervous brushstrokes. (And no, the painting doesn’t cry when you look at it—but it might sigh dramatically.)
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with strong connection partners
# remember me caf'e
Each time I return to Taiwan, a soft longing stirs within me — not to leave, but to grow, to journey outward, and to gather new colors of experience.
This project was born from that rhythm: a quiet dance between departure and return, between solitude and sharing.
Through fragments and whispers, I offer this space — a place where memories, dreams, and distant songs weave together.
I hope you will find something of yourself here, too.
#reflection
Topic
cold or hot, juice or booze:
This exhibition is about creating a place where people can pause, think, cry, and simply stay.
A quiet space — one I believe Taipei still holds in its hidden corners.
I wanted to build this scene for those who need it,
just as, when I was a child, there were people around me who protected me gently.
I feel that many people in this city carry heavy emotions…
and though I don’t fully understand all of them,
I wonder if I might be able to create something that brings comfort,
even just a little.
About the Art
“Self-Reflection” also came from the many questions people have asked me —
“What do you paint?”
For me, abstract art always reflects human emotions.
Today someone may feel happy, and the canvas shines bright;
another day, the same canvas may carry quiet sorrow.
I don’t define the meaning of the paintings —
why some use white, why some use blue…
It all depends on the filter through which your eyes see.
And because everyone sees colors differently,
I’ve written a few notes on my website,
for those who want to explore more after the exhibition.
Through this, I hope people can glimpse my world —
and perhaps, understand those around them (and me) a little deeper.
A Personal Reflection
“Self-Reflection” is not only about a scene or a theme.
It is also about me.
After returning home,
I found it hard to reconnect — to find collaborators or close friends —
because I realized how deeply different I am.
Sometimes even conversation feels distant,
as if we don’t speak the same language anymore.
It made me feel both afraid and isolated.
That’s why I hold exhibitions —
to try and build a bridge, to connect more deeply with this land and its people.
If I can do that, it would be something truly beautiful.
A Small Note
I hope you enjoy my art,
and I look forward to meeting you again — perhaps at a formal exhibition in the near future!
This space is very precious to me.
It supports me as an artist,
and gives me the strength to bring more dreams and energy back to share.
You can also follow @vanilla.sounds on Instagram —
I will post special small events there.
Thank you for being part of this quiet journey.
An in-between space—between time and self, between fear and choice.
# statement
Reflection, Not Replacement
Collaborating with AI, I did not seek to be replaced, but to reflect.
與 AI 的協作過程中，我並非尋求替代，而是尋求反射
Memory and Movement
Each slow step carries the weight of unseen memories. Between the rush and the stillness, we dance with the fragments of our own becoming.
Clarity in Slowness
In slowing down, I found not answers, but clarity.
It’s like walking through a soft dream — where time pauses, whispers grow louder, and little moments glow quietly in your hands.
"In slowing down, I found not answers, but clarity."
Emotional Process
This uncertain, emotional process became part of the work itself.
這段既不確定又情感豐富的歷程，本身也成為了作品的一部分。
The Quiet Conversation
Through the quiet conversation between a rabbit and a slow-moving girl.
透過一隻焦慮的兔子與一位步調緩慢的女孩之間的對話
Later that day, Ketina and the rabbit sat in a quiet meadow.
The sun warmed their faces, and the wind gently played with the grass.
“Do you remember the last time you smiled just because the wind felt nice?” she asked.
The rabbit stayed silent. He couldn’t remember.
“Maybe time isn’t chasing you,” Ketina said. “Maybe it’s asking you to notice it.”
第二章：草地中的停頓
那天下午，Ketina 和兔子坐在一片安靜的草地上。
陽光溫柔地照在臉上，風輕輕吹過草尖。
「你記得上次因為風很舒服而微笑，是什麼時候嗎？」她問。
兔子沉默不語。他已經不記得了。
「或許不是時間在追你，」Ketina 說。「也許，是時間在等你回頭看看它。」
“My time is running out,” the rabbit said.
A girl dressed in gold with a patterned belt stood nearby. Her name was Ketina.
“Why are you always rushing?” she asked. “Life can be more comfortable if you slow down. People will still respect you—and your work.”
“No, no. Never! I have so many things to do… so many!”
第一章：兔子的匆忙
「我的時間快沒了。」兔子說。
一位穿著金色衣裳、繫著圖騰腰帶的女孩站在一旁。她名叫 Ketina。
「你為什麼總是這麼匆忙呢？」她問。「慢一點地活，日子會更舒服。人們依然會尊重你，還有你的事業。」
「不、不行，我有太多事情要處理了……太多了！」
“My time is running out,” the rabbit said.
A girl dressed in gold with a patterned belt stood nearby. Her name was Ketina.
“Why are you always rushing?” she asked. “Life can be more comfortable if you slow down. People will still respect you—and your work.”
“No, no. Never! I have so many things to do… so many!”
第一章：兔子的匆忙
「我的時間快沒了。」兔子說。
一位穿著金色衣裳、繫著圖騰腰帶的女孩站在一旁。她名叫 Ketina。
「你為什麼總是這麼匆忙呢？」她問。「慢一點地活，日子會更舒服。人們依然會尊重你，還有你的事業。」
「不、不行，我有太多事情要處理了……太多了！」
Later that day, Ketina and the rabbit sat in a quiet meadow.
The sun warmed their faces, and the wind gently played with the grass.
“Do you remember the last time you smiled just because the wind felt nice?” she asked.
The rabbit stayed silent. He couldn’t remember.
“Maybe time isn’t chasing you,” Ketina said. “Maybe it’s asking you to notice it.”
第二章：草地中的停頓
那天下午，Ketina 和兔子坐在一片安靜的草地上。
陽光溫柔地照在臉上，風輕輕吹過草尖。
「你記得上次因為風很舒服而微笑，是什麼時候嗎？」她問。
兔子沉默不語。他已經不記得了。
「或許不是時間在追你，」Ketina 說。「也許，是時間在等你回頭看看它。」
The winds and flowers swayed with the rabbit’s soft voice.
“I don’t know… I don’t know…” he whispered again and again.
He looked frustrated. “These winds are annoying… why are they following me?”
Ketina remained calm.
“If you want to leave the place that no longer feels right, I can walk with you,” she said.
“But… what if I don’t like where I end up?”
“You don’t have to choose right away,” she smiled. “You can pause. You can think.”
Ketina didn’t try to change him. She simply made space.
Together, they stood quietly—somewhere between departure and decision.
Then, Ketina whispered some soft words.
Not a spell.
Just a gentle invitation.
Golden words floated into the air like slow-moving light.
第四章：風中的輕語
風與花隨著兔子的聲音輕輕搖擺。
「我不知道……我不知道……」他一遍又一遍地低語。
他顯得煩躁。「這些風好煩……為什麼一直跟著我？」
Ketina 依然靜靜地站著。
「如果你想離開不再適合的地方，我可以陪你走一段路，」她說。
「可是……萬一我也不喜歡新的地方呢？」
「你不需要馬上選擇，」她微笑。「你可以停一下，想一想。」
Ketina 並沒有要改變他，只是給他一個空間。
他們安靜地站著——在離開與選擇之間的某個地方。
接著，Ketina 輕輕說了幾句話。
不是咒語。
只是溫柔的邀請。
金色的字句如緩緩升起的光，在空中飄浮。
Ketina led the rabbit to a strange tree, its bark shining like glass.
“This tree doesn’t show your face,” she said. “It shows your soul.”
The rabbit looked in. He saw tired eyes, a racing mind, a heart that beat only for duties.
“Who are you, really?” the tree seemed to whisper.
“I… I don’t know anymore,” the rabbit said.
第三章：樹鏡之境
Ketina 帶兔子來到一棵奇特的樹前，樹皮閃爍著像鏡面一樣的光。
「這棵樹不會反映你的外貌，」她說。「它會映出你的靈魂。」
兔子望向鏡樹，看見一雙疲憊的眼睛、一顆不斷運轉的心，以及一個只為責任跳動的胸膛。
「你真正是誰？」鏡樹低語著。
「我……我已經不知道了，」兔子說。
The winds and flowers swayed with the rabbit’s soft voice.
“I don’t know… I don’t know…” he whispered again and again.
He looked frustrated. “These winds are annoying… why are they following me?”
Ketina remained calm.
“If you want to leave the place that no longer feels right, I can walk with you,” she said.
“But… what if I don’t like where I end up?”
“You don’t have to choose right away,” she smiled. “You can pause. You can think.”
Ketina didn’t try to change him. She simply made space.
Together, they stood quietly—somewhere between departure and decision.
Then, Ketina whispered some soft words.
Not a spell.
Just a gentle invitation.
Golden words floated into the air like slow-moving light.
第四章：風中的輕語
風與花隨著兔子的聲音輕輕搖擺。
「我不知道……我不知道……」他一遍又一遍地低語。
他顯得煩躁。「這些風好煩……為什麼一直跟著我？」
Ketina 依然靜靜地站著。
「如果你想離開不再適合的地方，我可以陪你走一段路，」她說。
「可是……萬一我也不喜歡新的地方呢？」
「你不需要馬上選擇，」她微笑。「你可以停一下，想一想。」
Ketina 並沒有要改變他，只是給他一個空間。
他們安靜地站著——在離開與選擇之間的某個地方。
接著，Ketina 輕輕說了幾句話。
不是咒語。
只是溫柔的邀請。
金色的字句如緩緩升起的光，在空中飄浮。
Ketina led the rabbit to a strange tree, its bark shining like glass.
“This tree doesn’t show your face,” she said. “It shows your soul.”
The rabbit looked in. He saw tired eyes, a racing mind, a heart that beat only for duties.
“Who are you, really?” the tree seemed to whisper.
“I… I don’t know anymore,” the rabbit said.
第三章：樹鏡之境
Ketina 帶兔子來到一棵奇特的樹前，樹皮閃爍著像鏡面一樣的光。
「這棵樹不會反映你的外貌，」她說。「它會映出你的靈魂。」
兔子望向鏡樹，看見一雙疲憊的眼睛、一顆不斷運轉的心，以及一個只為責任跳動的胸膛。
「你真正是誰？」鏡樹低語著。
「我……我已經不知道了，」兔子說。
“Wow… oh…”
The rabbit looked down. His hands and feet were turning into soft light.
Ketina sat nearby, grounded and calm.
She whispered—not to control, not to direct,
But to offer a wish:
“Let him find a place…
where time feels soft,
where memory returns like a friend.”
She looked at him, not asking for anything.
She gave him space.
And in that quiet,
the rabbit began to remember—
not what he had done,
but who he was.
第五章：記憶之所
「哇……喔……」
兔子低頭看著，發現自己的手腳正變成輕盈的光。
Ketina 坐在一旁，依然平靜穩定。
她輕聲低語，不是為了控制，也不是為了引導，
只是為了送出一個願望：
「願他找到一個地方……
時間是溫柔的，
記憶像老朋友一樣回來。」
她只是看著他，什麼都不要求。
她給了他空間。
而在那片寧靜中，
兔子開始想起來——
不是他做過什麼，
而是他是誰。
“Wow… oh…”
The rabbit looked down. His hands and feet were turning into soft light.
Ketina sat nearby, grounded and calm.
She whispered—not to control, not to direct,
But to offer a wish:
“Let him find a place…
where time feels soft,
where memory returns like a friend.”
She looked at him, not asking for anything.
She gave him space.
And in that quiet,
the rabbit began to remember—
not what he had done,
but who he was.
第五章：記憶之所
「哇……喔……」
兔子低頭看著，發現自己的手腳正變成輕盈的光。
Ketina 坐在一旁，依然平靜穩定。
她輕聲低語，不是為了控制，也不是為了引導，
只是為了送出一個願望：
「願他找到一個地方……
時間是溫柔的，
記憶像老朋友一樣回來。」
她只是看著他，什麼都不要求。
她給了他空間。
而在那片寧靜中，
兔子開始想起來——
不是他做過什麼，
而是他是誰。
Concept & Closing
cold or hot, juice or booze:
Yogurt & granola bowl
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Mauris consectetur congue ipsum at suscipit.
AI Collaboration Notes
A personal note on working with AI:
At first, I was hesitant to involve a machine in something so personal. But in allowing AI to co-write the story with me, I found a new kind of collaboration—one based on trust, curiosity, and surrender.
Series Concept
The five chapters of Rabbit Hole are not a linear journey, but a gentle cycle.
Each painting does not illustrate the story literally, but resonates with the emotions held in each phase of the narrative.
Copyright
All intellectual property rights to the work “Rabbit Hole: The In-Between Space”, including all related images and texts, belong to the original creator, KE-TIAN, LIN (KETINA / VANILLA).
The organizer, [Institution/Exhibition Name], is hereby granted a non-exclusive, non-commercial license to publicly display and distribute the work as part of the exhibition, promotional materials, publications, official website, and social media channels related to the project.
This license is limited to the scope of this specific exhibition or collaboration, and proper credit to the artist and the work must be maintained.
No reproduction, adaptation, or commercial use is permitted without prior written consent.
All other rights are reserved by the original creator.
本作品《Rabbit Hole：中間值之境》及其所有相關圖像與文字內容，著作權均屬原創作者林可恬(KETINA / VANILLA)所有。
茲授權___________ 於展覽、出版、媒體宣傳、官方網站及社群平台上進行非營利性之公開展示與傳播。
此授權僅限於本次展覽／合作範疇內使用，並應標示作者名稱及作品名稱，不得進行重製、改作、或另行商業使用。
原作者保留一切其他權利。